First of all, I have been way too busy to comment here on NU's current 9th place position in the Big Ten standings, or what's known as "the usual" in the Carshitty era. The internet is a big place and there are way too many dick jokes to write, so I have been busier than than a chubby Pi Phi girl's vagina on date night. Plus the language of the guest blogger from a few weeks back really offended me. You know if you're going to drop f-bombs, at least throw in a douchenozzle, fucktard, asslicking cocksmoking abortionriffic shitwad, or cumbucket once in awhile. Seriously, you all went to NU you should be better than that. Anyway, a few quick comments before I start filling out my Carshitty for coach of the year ballot since there are two teams with worse records in the Big Ten than NU and I never would have expected that under Carshitty's leadership.
1. The poll this post links to is fucking idiotic even for the likely UNC student who put it together. Now look, I'm no John Alongi , heck I'm not even Bei Zhang , but I did take a few math classes at NU and I know that if a team has an overall record of 12 and 5, they can't be 5 and 6 against the Top 100, it's just not fucking possible. So either I am reading this dickbag's table incorrectly, or the information is incorrect . So regardless of what conclusions he is trying to draw, who the fuck knows if any of his numbers are right, so as always, don't believe anything you read on the internet.
2. I know, all the excuse bugs are out. We don't have coble, we've played the toughest schedule in the Big Ten, we are playing with a Coach who finds one gimmick and then rides it to death until he winds up being more exposed than Carmen Luvana in a Bang Bus video. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I get it. Really, a bunch of shit hasn't been in our favor, cry me a fucking river, unless that river is the Amazon, because there are way too many diseases in South America and AC values his health. But if you look at these bullshit computerized rankings, like KenPom, which should normalize for strength of schedule and margin of victory, we still rank 8th in the Big fucking Ten. As Bill Parcells likes to say "You are what you are" and we are at best an eigth place Big Ten team in year 10 of the Car-No-Win-Dy Error.
3. It is amazing what happens when we play well coached teams who tell their players a little something like "hey, don't dribble right into the top of the 1-3-1 zone." It is really that simple. Apparently Sidney Lowe did not get that message. All teams have to do is pass the ball to one of the two open men on the baseline and then watch the basket rattle with a thunderous dunk. Just watch what Ohio State did to us. It was embarrassing to watch that coaching performance by Carshitty who put our players in a position to lose from the opening tip to our first shot clock violation.
4. We just need to go 7 and 5 in the next 12 Big Ten games to have a shot at the tournament, and seeing as how Carshitty has likely never had a 7 and 5 Big Ten stretch in his 10 shitastic years, I'm not holding my breath. Of course it doesn't matter anyway because he can always claim he got fucked without Coble so this season is a built in excuse for Loser Bill. What a fucking joke. Gimmick me this, why can't we change strategies that don't work?
Anyway, I really don't have much to say. Carshitty's 9th place team has outperformed my expectations so it is possible we finish out of the cellar.
1 Comments:
First of all, I have been way too busy to comment here on NU's current 9th place position in the Big Ten standings, or what's known as "the usual" in the Carshitty era. The internet is a big place and there are way too many dick jokes to write, so I have been busier than than a chubby Pi Phi girl's vagina on date night. Plus the language of the guest blogger from a few weeks back really offended me. You know if you're going to drop f-bombs, at least throw in a douchenozzle, fucktard, asslicking cocksmoking abortionriffic shitwad, or cumbucket once in awhile. Seriously, you all went to NU you should be better than that. Anyway, a few quick comments before I start filling out my Carshitty for coach of the year ballot since there are two teams with worse records in the Big Ten than NU and I never would have expected that under Carshitty's leadership.
1. The poll this post links to is fucking idiotic even for the likely UNC student who put it together. Now look, I'm no John Alongi , heck I'm not even Bei Zhang , but I did take a few math classes at NU and I know that if a team has an overall record of 12 and 5, they can't be 5 and 6 against the Top 100, it's just not fucking possible. So either I am reading this dickbag's table incorrectly, or the information is incorrect . So regardless of what conclusions he is trying to draw, who the fuck knows if any of his numbers are right, so as always, don't believe anything you read on the internet.
2. I know, all the excuse bugs are out. We don't have coble, we've played the toughest schedule in the Big Ten, we are playing with a Coach who finds one gimmick and then rides it to death until he winds up being more exposed than Carmen Luvana in a Bang Bus video. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I get it. Really, a bunch of shit hasn't been in our favor, cry me a fucking river, unless that river is the Amazon, because there are way too many diseases in South America and AC values his health. But if you look at these bullshit computerized rankings, like KenPom, which should normalize for strength of schedule and margin of victory, we still rank 8th in the Big fucking Ten. As Bill Parcells likes to say "You are what you are" and we are at best an eigth place Big Ten team in year 10 of the Car-No-Win-Dy Error.
3. It is amazing what happens when we play well coached teams who tell their players a little something like "hey, don't dribble right into the top of the 1-3-1 zone." It is really that simple. Apparently Sidney Lowe did not get that message. All teams have to do is pass the ball to one of the two open men on the baseline and then watch the basket rattle with a thunderous dunk. Just watch what Ohio State did to us. It was embarrassing to watch that coaching performance by Carshitty who put our players in a position to lose from the opening tip to our first shot clock violation.
4. We just need to go 7 and 5 in the next 12 Big Ten games to have a shot at the tournament, and seeing as how Carshitty has likely never had a 7 and 5 Big Ten stretch in his 10 shitastic years, I'm not holding my breath. Of course it doesn't matter anyway because he can always claim he got fucked without Coble so this season is a built in excuse for Loser Bill. What a fucking joke. Gimmick me this, why can't we change strategies that don't work?
Anyway, I really don't have much to say. Carshitty's 9th place team has outperformed my expectations so it is possible we finish out of the cellar.
Fuck Carmody
AC
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